Field of Awakening (FOA) is a program designed and led by Sri Preethaji, an enlightened spiritual master from India. It offers an immersive experiential happening through a combination of teachings, deep mystic processes, and meditation practices. Participants are guided on an introspective journey of self-exploration, liberation from constraining beliefs and emotional barriers, and cultivation of inner peace, clarity, and purpose. This process enables participants to embrace authenticity and effect meaningful change in both their personal lives and the broader community (1).
Beyond the Ordinary
September 2023 marked my first participation in this event, inspired by my wife Tina's remarkable experience a year prior. I approached it with enthusiasm, eager to join in. I was not disappointed. I experienced a transition in my inner state toward a sense of peacefulness, not easily influenced by external events that in the past would have led to a stressful condition. This change from tension to calmness arose from active participation in practices that stimulated movements within my energy body, allowing my mind to quiet its chatter and experience opening to higher states of consciousness.
I learned that there are three types of responses to life challenges that sculpt one's destiny. The first is an inferior response that results from any of the common states of suffering, such as anxiety, anger, sadness, and frustration. The second is a mediocre response, which is either a habitual reaction or a response stemming from some type of ideal or ideology. The third, preferred response is an extraordinary one, which is generated from a non-suffering state — the state of true connection. In my life, I have experienced all three responses, but as a benefit of FOA, I dissolved some of my inferior or mediocre responses in favor of extraordinary responding to many outside circumstances.
From the very first day of FOA, I had several intense inner experiences. As an illustration, I will recount an entry from my journal detailing my experience with the activation of chakras, the wheels of energy life force that impact physical health, emotional well-being, and spiritual growth. I wrote:
“I was engaged in chants during the activation of the first four chakras. Initially, I felt restless and fatigued, my mind wandering when the session would conclude as we exceeded the planned duration by two hours. However, when the activation of the throat chakra commenced, I ceased chanting. I perceived a pulsating blue light, instantly removing my fatigue and I became fully present, deeply immersed in the moment. The third eye chakra activation followed. I was again completely engaged, but this time without any visual effects. Instead, I felt intense vibrations coursing through my entire body, causing involuntary shaking. Finally, as the crown chakra was activated, I witnessed a vivid visual phenomenon: above my head, a large horizontal vortex encircled with faint lights in the center, expanding and connecting with the cosmos, the galaxy, and the universal intelligence. It was an unparalleled experience. I asked myself why these occurrences manifested primarily in the upper chakras. Could it be due to the prior activation of the kundalini energy in the lower chakras?"
The Path Within
Surprisingly, I felt a strong connection with Sri Preethaji’s main assistant, Samardashinaji. I admired her teaching style, devotion, and authenticity. Her words resonated with conviction and strength, compelling listeners to pay close attention and enter a space of discovery untouched by fear or conflict. She could distill the essence of the entire program in a single sentence, which still resonates vividly in my memory: “Awareness is the antidote for the poison of suffering.” She urged all of us to cultivate this antidote, an effortless state of awareness, through the repetitive practice of Serene Mind meditation thereby rewiring the brain.
Despite initially aspiring to become a physician in her youth, Samardashinaji's life took a different course when a spiritual experience compelled her to embrace the path of enlightenment alongside Sri Preethaji and her husband, Sri Krishnaji. I met with her twice and asked if she would be willing to be my mentor and meet individually. Unfortunately, she couldn't accommodate my request due to her obligations to Sri Preethaji. I told my friend Margaret about my desire for mentorship. She inquired why it held such importance to me. After pondering for a while, I articulated my reasons with these words:
"I suppose I harbor a deep-seated desire to be truly heard and understood. Throughout both my professional and personal life, I have been a dedicated listener, providing a safe space and support to others. It is something that comes naturally to me, and I have always felt I possess a good capacity for empathy and compassion. However, I would like to experience a relationship in which I am the recipient of guidance, rather than providing it. My introspective nature thrives in one-on-one conversations, granting me the time and space to express myself fully and ask any questions arising in my consciousness."
I had an opportunity to converse with another disciple of Sri Preethaji and Sri Krishnaji by the name Radhikaji, with a similar idea in mind. However, she said that the path I would need to follow was to come to Ekam in India. There, I would be a part of the community of seekers in the program called Tapas, led by Sri Krishnaji, and gradually awaken to enlightenment over the course of 6 weeks. I felt pressured to do it right away, even though I wasn't ready. During our conversation over Zoom, I expressed my vision for enlightenment. I said:
“Enlightenment for me means full liberation from states of suffering, helping my soul circle, assisting others, embracing a passionate life, writing from a place of true inspiration without the need for recognition, genuinely expressing the divine spark within me, and approaching others with an open heart filled with compassion. I have glimpses of all these aspects, but only glimpses. I aspire to reside in this beautiful state permanently. I see it as a meaningful transition from working as a psychiatrist to doing work as a spiritually enlightened being in Sedona and beyond.”
Since that time, my head has "cooled off." I have continued the process of "seeking" through determined experiential practices and learning about the oneness and non-dual state of consciousness. Regularly, I join a Zoom meditation group facilitated by Brenda Hagman, a friend whose dedication has flourished, using her reflective and imaginative abilities to the fullest.
In addition, I signed up for a live monthly program by Sri Preethaji called Manifest. This 4-hour-long presentation covers a multitude of topics. Sri Preethaji skillfully guides participants to manifest their true potential and live abundantly, using a combination of teaching, chanting, yoga, and mystical meditation practices (2). This year, every month the emphasis is on chakras: the traditional seven and the additional five. Her main focus is to activate each chakra to its optimal function. This process enables Kundalini energy to flow upward, becoming a conduit for the experience of pure consciousness, the state of oneness. At the end of each session, Sri Preedaji gives a special blessing called Deeksha, the transmission of energy that enables participants to experience higher realms of consciousness.
Second Field of Awakening
Tina and I spent four memorable days in Fort Lauderdale, Florida in March 2024 attending another Field of Awakening. I have to admit that I came to this program with a degree of skepticism. I remained uncertain if it truly aligned with the spiritual path I wanted to follow. This mindset may have colored my overall experience. Yet, witnessing other participants radiating with enthusiasm was uplifting. Meeting familiar faces from online programs and past FOA added a comforting familiarity.
I was assigned to group#13 with Brenda Hagman, again being the leader. Everyone in our small group enjoyed her commitment and ability to keep us on track following instructions she received from the leaders of the program.
I stepped into the venue with expectations shaped by my previous experience at FOA. However, this time, the conference room seemed smaller and the crowd larger. This change had a notable impact on Tina, who nearly opted out of participation due to her initial feelings of extreme fatigue and mental and physical heaviness on the first day. Throughout the lengthy sessions of the day, I remained seated on the floor chair, enduring discomfort and achy legs. Eventually, I switched to a regular chair for the subsequent days, finding it to be a much more comfortable option.
Naturally, as invariably happens, my experience of this FOA was different. As I mentioned earlier, I chose to wear my skeptical hat, the mindset of cautiousness rather than unquestioning acceptance. This decision was informed by the understanding that we are all susceptible to the influence of individuals we hold in esteem, trust, or view as authorities. Suggestibility is a characteristic built into our brains and relationships with others. The more deeply rooted we are within a community, the more likely we are to be swayed by its collective mindset. This inclination stems from a fundamental human drive to connect or belong, whether to family, peers, tribes, nations, global movements, or humanity as a whole.
Balancing Skepticism and Openness
Throughout my life, I have been ambivalent about belonging to any organization or group. Many times it has proven beneficial. Moreover, I am trained to think that the scientific method is the most reliable way of acquiring knowledge. Scientists meticulously assess evidence, design experiments, analyze data, and draw conclusions. They use critical thinking for unbiased evaluation of information. A critical thinker follows the evidence wherever it may lead, with skepticism, curiosity, and impartiality. This way of thinking is in a good position to eradicate prejudices and biases while uncovering hidden manipulations, distortions, and misinformation.
Although scientific inquiry prioritizes empirical evidence, logical deduction, and skepticism, spirituality often includes elements like faith, intuition, personal experiences, and contemplation. These aspects don't always align with the analytical and objective stance of scientific thought. Consequently, I have a dilemma, how to reconcile and integrate these divergent perspectives—a difficult task to accomplish.
Liberation from Past Bonds
While attentively absorbing the teachings and engaging in the exercises, I observed others brimming with enthusiasm that I couldn't quite match. I saw that many participants anticipated miracles to alleviate past traumas, physical ailments, and mental distress. Some shared their remarkable experiences, receiving applause and admiration for their inspirational and gratifying accounts.
The atmosphere was respectful, accompanied by a tangible sense of attentiveness. Music played a significant role, guiding us into various states of consciousness through its vibrations. Having met Sri Preethaji twice before, I was once again impressed by her calm presence, the smile that rarely left her face, and her compelling and authentic teaching. Her voice resonated with conviction, filling the space with her state of being conducive to the mystical processes she led us through.
The objective of this FOA was ambitious: to unveil and free participants from the hidden influences of the past—the subtle energies of samskaras and vasanas—impressions originating from early life, previous existences, or ancestors, karmically related to deeds, experiences, or thoughts that are deeply ingrained within the fabric of subconscious mind. Merely being aware of them was not enough. Being awakened to them was the path to liberation from attachment to the gravitational pull stemming from the past.
Using the language of present-day science, samskaras and vasanas can be understood as the lingering effects of prior actions, thoughts, and emotions on gene expression. This influence manifests in the formation and strengthening of neuronal pathways expressed in the axiom "Neurons that fire together wire together." The repeated activation of the same neural pathways leads to increased connectivity and efficiency and the formation of the habits of the mind. Consequently, one's perception of reality is sculpted by past experiences, whether personal, ancestral, or shared among humanity as a whole. Reality, thus perceived, becomes a composite of these varied perspectives, obscuring the view from the vantage point of pure consciousness—the state of liberated clarity.
The four-day program aimed to bring samskaras and vasanas to the forefront of awareness using multiple tools in the arsenal formed by the energy of the group of more than 400 participants and guided by Sri Preethaji through the power of her enlightened state, yogic breathing, kundalini rising, and total presence in enhanced awareness. In this state of connection, Sri Preethaji was assisting the process of cleansing the negative influences of samskaras and vasanas, paving the way for a clearer, more awakened, non-suffering state of consciousness.
Appearance of Sri Krishnaji
The last day of FOA brought the unexpected presence of Sri Krishnaji. This was the first time he had come in person to FOA, as his daughter Lokka, a student in New York City, had a spring break and wanted to visit Miami. When Sri Preethaji heard that he would be in the vicinity during FOA, she immediately asked him to come.
Prior to his arrival, the atmosphere in the conference room buzzed with excitement. Everyone knew Sri Krishnaji was “the real deal,” deeply committed to helping others in their spiritual growth through dissolving all suffering states. He comes from a lineage of enlightened sages, with his parents, Sri Amma and Sri Bhagavan, among them. From a young age, he encountered mystical phenomena. Sri Krishnaji is credited with originating the Deeksha phenomenon. His spontaneous spiritual awakening at the age of eleven endowed him with the ability to administer Deeksha, a mystical practice capable of initiating a profound shift in consciousness, potentially leading to enlightenment or liberation (Mukti). Deeksha involves the transmission of divine grace—a subtle energy vibration stemming from universal intelligence—to the recipient (3).
Enthusiastic applause filled the room upon Sri Krishnaji's entrance. His energy was different from that of his wife, Sri Preethaji. He was more spontaneous in interactions, while she was more reserved even with the words she used. He easily burst into laughter and gave to-the-point responses. I can imagine him in his day-to-day activities, quickly responding with wit and not choosing his words carefully as his wife does. This makes him more relatable and "human." He stayed in the room for an hour, answering questions and then providing the special blessing of intentional Deeksha. It was a real treat to see him for the first time in person.
Exploring Conception's Impact
The most important experience for me was identifying samskaras at the time of conception. The moment of conception stands as one of the pivotal nodes in a person's life. The inner state of the parents and their intentions at that time, along with the influence of past lives, ancestors, and collective human consciousness, holds great importance. Sri Preethaji led us to a mystical practice that resonated with me, becoming my most immersive experience during FOA. I strived to quiet my mind, keep it out of the way, and let the energy flow effortlessly from the "field" into my consciousness tracing back to the moment of conception.
I was deeply engaged in my inner state patiently waiting for something to emerge. My initial experience revolved around helping others, whether it was tending to patients or assisting family members. I was not surprised because, from an early age, I decided to become a doctor. This resolve came from my inner knowing and intuition.
The second and most impressive experience centered on the main portion of the process. Here I had a vision of a triangular tunnel hurtling forward at remarkable speed. At its base sat a luminous figure in a meditative pose, which I perceived as a representation of Buddha. The vividness of the experience and its unusualness guided me to seek clarification about its meaning. I even attempted to inquire with Sri Krishnaji during the Q&A session, yet despite fervently waving my arm, I wasn't selected.
Following the “Buddha” vision, the word "doubt" emerged as the third image, quickly being succeeded by the fourth image, depicting my wife, Tina, and my friend Margaret. The appearance of doubt was again understandable to me. Doubt was there to help me question assumptions, consider alternative perspectives, and evaluate evidence thoroughly before forming conclusions. Undoubtedly, the presence of this samskara has likely influenced my affinity for the sciences.
The appearance of my wife and my friend's image at the end of the sequence suggests to me that they might have been part of my past lives. This conviction is inspired by the insights of Stanislav Grof, who proposes that those we encounter in our current lives may have been significant figures in our previous incarnations. According to Grof, our relationships and encounters aren't merely chance occurrences but are shaped by connections from our past lives (4).
In Search of Certainty
This impactful experience during mystical journeying to the time of conception brought the ultimate question to my mind about the interplay between certainty and uncertainty. Throughout my life, there have been moments of unequivocal clarity where I have known precisely which direction to take. For example, at the age of eleven, I embraced the aspiration to become a physician, and at the beginning of my medical education, the realization came to me that psychiatry was my true calling. Similarly, the longing to study the English language and ultimately relocate to America felt like an integral part of the path I needed to follow.
On the other side, the side where uncertainty resides, currently I am not feeling quite confident about my spiritual path. I am wrestling with doubts about whether engaging in oneness practices and traveling to India aligns with my true path. My experience at FOA has introduced me to individuals with unwavering faith and conviction, something I lack. Our teachers and some of the participants I encountered strongly advocated going to Ekam in India as the definitive route to enlightenment.
Nevertheless, I appreciated my time at FOA very much. It was a retreat full of positive experiences where I forged meaningful connections, practiced meditation and yoga, and absorbed the wisdom of teachings. While I can't recount every single moment, various situations and events undoubtedly contributed to my heightened energy state.
Despite lingering doubts, I am currently committed to pursuing my exploration of oneness spirituality. I have registered for the forthcoming FOA event in Los Angeles scheduled for September 2024. I have also been actively involved in the online discussions in FOA follow-up calls, consistently participating in Manifest, and dedicating time to daily meditation. I am also looking forward to venturing to Sweden in 2025. There, I will participate in the process known as Turiya at the Oneness Nordic Center, the exploration of the fourth dimension of pure consciousness with both Sri Preethaji and Sri Krishnaji.
Namaste!
4. The Cosmic Game (Explorations of the Frontiers of Human Consciousness), by Stanislav Grof, State Univ of New York Pr., 1998.
By Zelko Leon
TINA’S PERSPECTIVE
My first experience of this event, Field of Awakening (FOA), was in Los Angeles two years ago. I made this “big trip” outside my comfort zone, aware of the intensity and experiences from the stories of other participants. We had been a part of a morning group practicing oneness-based meditations since COVID-19 days. This grew out of the Sedona-based Meditation Mondays through the mental health community consortium where we live. I am still amazed when I think about the great journey that started one March 2020 morning. That original need for connection and support evolved into a movement toward our own enlightenment path.
Psychologically, I had anxieties about how my body would manage the rigors of traveling, sitting long hours, and managing a roommate I had never met. I faced these challenges in all these areas and through the experiences found courage, strength, and desire to grow and live without all my habitual suffering routines. In 2023, my husband, Zelko agreed to attend the next FOA with me and be my roommate. (I was so relieved) I witnessed his passion and heart opening with surprise and delight. Given our divergent spiritual histories, this shared experience felt like a gift from God.
FOA in Florida
Sharing space with hundreds of people from all walks of life and all age ranges; sharing the curiosity of imagining a new way to walk in the world was exciting. We explored new perspectives to bring awareness to and dissolve stress/suffering states and open to our heart’s potential. My experience got off with a pain-body reaction. Eckhart Tolle writes about the pain-body with the description “an energy field of old but still very-much-alive emotion that lives in almost every human being.” All my old frustrations of things not being the way I wanted them to be appeared. I was planning how to leave early, sit in the least crowded area, and complain to the organizers. I was filled with distraction and did not feel “the bird singing its song” as Sri Preethaji lovingly describes living in an enlightened state.
Aha Moment
A serene mind is a 3-minute meditation practice to become aware of your mind state. I have done it many times before. This practice has pearls of brain science and can help re-train your mind. What I realized while doing this practice with Sri Preethaji and others who led it, was that whatever your emotion was at the time, do not change it, but stay with it. Prior to that I “worked hard” to change the negative emotion into a more positive or preferable one. The wisdom of meditation is the acceptance of your current situation, hold that in your third eye energy center, and imagine a tiny flame in the middle of your brain gently dissolving the tension of the emotion. Sometimes I imagine Jesus during his time alone in stillness – dissolving away all the doubts and fears that came before him…. and I know he practiced! I hung in there that first day and with each day after, I became even more aware, tuning in more to what I really desired for my life. The antidote to suffering habits is awareness. One question that came up to those who want their stress/suffering states to end tomorrow. “Why are you in such a rush to end this suffering?”
There were many stories and meditative processes where I explored my inner state and let go of many of my old beliefs about how my life should have been and the emotions around them. Lightening up is not always easy but neither is staying in the same old habits that end up in complaints, fears, or frustrations. There were two powerful personal encounters with Sri Preethaji that I felt in my body; both in the hotel. The first one was in the hallway as she was about to enter the main ballroom. She was walking and I had come up to them hurriedly at first as I had been late getting there. She turned to me, met my gaze, and smiled deeply. The second one was the next day when, being a little late again, met her on the elevator down. She again met my eyes and smiled and seemed genuinely happy to see me. And I felt it – knew that my soul had been acknowledged and lovingly seen. These were quick interchanges, but the energy was palpable and will stay in my heart. I imagine myself being able to tune in with such presence to another. We all have potential.
Precious Pearls
“Every moment spent in suffering is a wasted moment.”
Small fires have the capacity to burn down forests. Being a little worried can morph into a stressed body, mind, and spirit. That is when life happens to us in whatever form. Awareness can open the door to dissolve this suffering and bring more Presence. As you begin to soak in this beautiful feeling you begin to teach your brain that you have a choice to live in the addictive state that our survival-focused life has rolled out for us or not. There are only two states. Stress/Suffering, anger, worry, frustration and fear, and non-suffering/calm, gratitude, peace, and joy.
Naked and standing amidst a gathering of people, my dream placed me in a prickly scene. I searched for my clothes and found them crumpled up where I had left them. I was the one who had taken them off – and it was only me, not my image that showed up. Frantic in the dream, I saw a glimpse of authenticity and just being yourself – as others in the group did not react. They were cool even though I was the only one in my original suit.
When I was a teenager, I experienced an event at my church that planted the seed of human potential. Even though it took years and many obstacles for this to flower, I feel now that Spring has come, each bloom more beautiful as it is seen with eyes that are less constricted and full of growing connection to my whole self, my highest potential and living each day with calm courage.
By Tina Johnson
I loved reading both of your experiences you expressed yourselves in an authentic way in your search for enlightenment and what is true for your path. Thanks for sharing!